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Friends

How to stay in touch with your friends

We all need friends for support and social interaction. Humans are social creatures, after all. As a busy carer, you may have less time to socialise than before. At the end of a long day, you may simply want to chill out at home when you’re not working.

It’s understandable that if you’re feeling tired and stressed, going out can seem like another task, especially if there’s travel involved. You might find that conversation with friends can become limited if you spend most of your time working as a carer and not enjoying new experiences.

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Over time, your social circle could get smaller. Some friendships may have dwindled, and your friends may not keep in touch as much as they used to. It’s a common theme among carers.

A previous survey by Carers UK, The State of Caring, analysed the lives of 5,000 carers. The survey showed that 57 per cent had lost touch with friends due to their caring role. Some 83 per cent said they felt lonely or socially isolated due to being a carer.

Try to keep in touch with your friends. Remember, it’s a two-way street. You may wish to occasionally go out with a friend for coffee or lunch. Perhaps you’d prefer to join a local support group to meet others facing the same caring challenges as you.

It’s also important to let your friends know what support you may need, as they may be suggesting activities that aren’t what you need right now. Let them know if going out partying isn’t your thing but you’d love a spa day or a quiet drink.

If friends have invited you out and you’ve had to say no several times because of work commitments, let them know you’d still like to keep in touch.

What if you don’t have the time or energy to go out?

While you may have less time or energy to go out, keeping in touch with friends is essential even if you don’t meet up in person. This means you have someone to talk to and receive emotional support when needed.

Even if you can’t go out as much, it’s worth conversing and sharing your latest news with those who care about you.

However, even if you have little time to meet with friends in person, there are many ways to keep in touch. Zoom, WhatsApp, Facebook Messenger, or occasionally calling your friends can be a mood booster.

Some of your friends may not have been carers and therefore don’t understand the amount of hard work and effort it entails. Let them know it’s challenging for you, but don’t make the entire conversation about your caring role.

While you may want to share some of your latest news, try to ask them about their lives. Combining friendship with a hobby is an excellent way to mix with others and do something that will boost your mental health, too. Invite a friend to join you at an exercise class or take up a new hobby. <Link to classes article>.