Here are our seven self-care tips to help you to look after yourself:
1. Share how you feel
Being a carer can feel lonely. But just because you feel alone, it doesn’t mean you are. Share how you’re feeling with others who understand. This might be a friend or loved one – you might find that once you’re honest about how you feel you have someone in your life you can share some of the caring tasks with.
There are organisations that can help you, too. Try contacting:
Carers UK helpline 0808 808 7777 or email advice@carersuk.org
Alzheimer’s Society support line 0333 150 3456
Age UK advice line 0800 678 1602
Dementia UK helpline 0800 888 6678
Independent Age helpline 0800 319 6789
You’ll also find others who understand from personal experience in our online forum here
However, if you feel you’re really struggling with your mental wellbeing, contact Samaritans or your GP.
2. Be realistic
As the old saying goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup, so take a realistic view on how much you’re able to do and what areas you could get help and support with.
Try writing down what you need to do yourself and what you could seek help with. Be aware of how you feel and think when you need a break, too, so you know when you need some respite.
3 Give back control Allowing the person you care for to have a say in how they’re supported can help you, too. Don’t assume you have to do it all. Granting them some independence can help you to enjoy a more balanced relationship.
Sit down with them and figure out what they can do, what they need help with and who else can help them with certain aspects of life – and then figure out what do they definitely need you to do.
4. Find the glimmers
When you’re caring for someone it can change the relationship you have with them – and that can be hard to come to terms with. But by finding ways to enjoy each other’s company that go beyond day-to-day tasks, you can create a more rewarding relationship.
Try:
Taking part in a hobby, activity or interest together, one that you both enjoy.
Chatting together – look at photo albums, relive past memories, chat about what you like about each other.
Reframe your thinking about who the person is – think of them as a family member, friend or loved one first.
5. Get organised
Caring for someone with dementia can feel like a juggling act, but you can make life easier for yourself. Use online tools like a Meal Planner, create a weekly and daily routine and use technology like apps and other tools to help you with planning, organising and setting reminders.
6. Look after your physical health
From talking to carers we know it’s easy to put your own physical wellbeing last. We also understand how physically demanding being a carer is. But by prioritising your own diet, sleep and fitness, you’ll feel better placed to help others.
Try to build time to ensure you eat at least one well balanced meal a day, get the right amount (and quality) of sleep and find ways to relax. Healthy coping techniques might include joining a group activity, finding a Pilates class, going for a walk with a friend or joining a choir. And don’t forget your own health checks, too.
7. Try to take a break
It’s not easy, we know, but planning in time to have a rest from caring is important. It gives you something to look forward to and gives your mind and body a break from caring responsibilities.
You can find out more about ways to take a break on the Carers Trust website here
Who to contact if you’re struggling to cope
Samaritans are available around the clock on 116 123 as a compassionate listening ear for carers who are finding life difficult or who feel in crisis.
Mind offer free counselling and online advice for those who need help with their mental health. Go to mind.org.uk for more information
Your GP can help if you’re finding it difficult to cope and might be able to signpost you to other support in your area