Some well-meaning carers can be unintentionally bossy or overbearing, and it can cause tension and also distress to the person with dementia.
It's essential to ensure the person can continue to do as much for themselves as possible. Don’t try to wrap them up in cotton wool; support them in continuing to do things they enjoy.
For instance, if your loved one enjoys baking, gardening, or going out for walks, encourage them to keep doing these things. Provide some additional support to help them carry out these tasks if they need it. But don’t be too bossy or try to take over completely. Otherwise, the person’s self-esteem could be affected.
Get the person involved in chores
Get the person involved when you’re doing things around the house, such as domestic chores or preparing meals. Ask them to help with chores – even if it takes them longer than usual or they need to ask you a few questions along the way – it will empower them.
Encourage them to keep up hobbies
Encourage the person to go out and keep up with hobbies they enjoyed before their dementia diagnosis. If they like to go to an exercise class or a weekly arts class, for instance, suggest that they keep pursuing their interests.
Some people with dementia can get depressed due to a lack of purpose. Not everyone knows what to say or how to behave around a person with dementia. Some friends can withdraw from the person, making their social circle smaller and leaving them more isolated. Encourage friends to rally round and explain that your loved one is still the same person who needs their support.
Sometimes, your loved one might say they want to give up a hobby because it seems harder than it used to be. Encourage them to keep it up. Explain that if it brings them pleasure, then they don’t need to stop.
Make sure you’re both active
Encourage them to be active, as we can all enjoy the benefits of regular exercise. Apart from the physical benefits, such as improved heart health and stronger muscles and bones, it also improves our mental health. If your loved one enjoys going to the gym or swimming, encourage them to keep doing what they love. You could even join them, and you may find it brings you closer together.
Make sure the dynamic of your relationship with your loved one isn’t just about you being the carer and them receiving care. Do things together. Let the person have input on tasks. Ask for their opinion on things.
How to empower your loved one
When it comes to the person going about household tasks, here’s some things you can do to empower them…
Break tasks down into smaller steps so that they aren’t too overwhelming
Be patient. Don’t rush them or tell them to hurry up
Thank them for their help if they are doing something to assist you. this will make them feel valuable. Be positive in your encouragement.
Never point out that a certain task they used to do with ease is taking them longer, or they’ve done it wrong. This will have a negative effect on their confidence and may even cause an argument.
Taking care of their health
Things your loved one can do to maintain their health and wellbeing and remain independent for longer…
Stay on top of their medication – make sure they don’t miss any of their tablets – prompt them to take medication or get them a dosette box so that they know what they’ve already taken
Maintain a healthy diet – encourage the person to eat a regular balanced diet. They may not be as interested in larger meals, so smaller portions more often may be the way to go.
Encourage them to rest – the person may wake more at night and may be tired during the day. Suggest they have a nap in day if they feel tired, but make sure it’s not too late in the day.
Minimise distractions – help the person focus on tasks or hobbies by getting rid of background noise, such as the radio and the TV.
Ensure your loved one remains active – if they don’t have a regular fitness routine, encourage them to join you on regular daily walks. If they aren’t very mobile, then taking the person outside and enjoying the fresh air together will benefit both of you.